You are not required to incriminate yourself in your application essay, nor should you.
When there are only a few spots left in the class, you want to be the one they choose. I don’t recommend a friend who is afraid to correct your mistakes, or a parent, if you can help it.
If your essay is forgettable, well, you might be too. A teacher or family friend would be a great choice.
I do have one personal favorite but I do not post it anywhere as it will then be used as a template for others to copy its form.
What I can do is to give you the essay that is looked upon as the greatest ever, although there is a bit of background to what it is and isn't.
On copious occurrences, pupils will endeavor to parade their current acquaintance with the English vernacular in an attempt to affect an air of knowledge. Remember, the admissions committee wants to focus on you, and sometimes it is hard to do so when all they are thinking is, “What is this person talking about?!
Let’s face it, that sounded a little silly, and this is exactly what we go through each time students attempt to replace every other word in their essays with longer words and more complex terms from a thesaurus. When a student attempts to stuff the essay with large words — words we both know are not a part of his or her everyday vocabulary — it often actually detracts from the piece. ” In my experience, students love to write about how they have learned from their mistakes.I have posted it on my blog and then wrote 'the rest of the story' on it the following day: Gregory Peck as Ahab What follows is the most famous admission essay ever.It is old but it is still used in many classrooms and workshops.***********************************************************************Space Group award winning train station design I am a dynamic figure, often seen scaling walls and crushing ice.Be sure you are using the correct form of words too (they’re, their, there, your, you’re, etc.).Few things will throw off an application evaluator more than misspellings and typos in the college essay — except when you mention the wrong college!They will go on and on about the time they did this illegal thing and broke the law, but it’s OK, because they learned from their mistake.The application process is competitive, and there are plenty of good applicants out there who have never broken the law.” rarely results in a boring application essay and can go in numerous directions. Go out on a limb and take a stab at the question that helps you paint a unique and compelling self-portrait. “In 10th grade, I became a hooker.” Yes, this is the actual first line of an application essay we received a few years ago and something I never imagined I would see while reading an admissions essay. Immediately I was stunned trying to think of the events that must have lead up to this moment and how this student was going to swing this into a positive light. What I didn’t know at the time was that a “hooker” was actually the name of a position on a rugby team.In fact, many schools have cool, offbeat essay questions that really provide you with the opportunity to present the admissions committee with new insight as to who you are. And if your dream school presents you with some of the old standards, remember to approach the subject from the most unique angle you can. The student went on about how he developed the strength and technique needed to be successful in the position and how that experience shaped him into the man he had become.This way, we are able to fully grasp why these particular characteristics, out of the many you could have selected, are so important to you and who you are as an individual.Besides, that other essay would go on forever, and, as I mentioned, we read thousands of these things each year.